Need to Recover From Divorce Fast?
Nothing holds you back in life like the fallout from a nasty divorce. The negativity it generates and instils in a mans soul is insidious and dangerous to your health, your relationships, your work and of course your overall mental state.
How to recover from divorce for men also looks a lot different than how women recover from divorce as well. Women usually have large social networks of friends and family that are more than willing to help and lend a hand, while men tend to try to go it alone and remain stoic in the face of serious mental health issues.
Men also tend not to help other men beyond lending a helping hand for moving and having the occasional beer together in a lot of cases leaving the emotional hurricane inside a divorced mans mind to blow unabated.
In this environment, men tend to try to fix themselves. However there is no manual to your mind and to relationships making this a blind zone where every problem looks like a nail that needs hammering which can be the wrong approach (metaphorically).
This article will give you some help if you are a guy in this situation. I hope it helps you understand your own mind better, and what you need to be doing to recover form your divorce fast.
Divorce Recovery Tips for Guys
1. Take some Time To Grieve
In divorce recovery for men there is no shame in being angry, being sad, being fearful, or a whole gamut of other emotions. Men have emotions and we need to feel them because they serve a purpose. You cannot get stuck grieving forever but there is a time that all human being go through to grieve a great loss such as the death of a loved one, or the loss of your wife and family and status. If you try to deny your feelings you will never be able to truly recover and mover on form divorce.
2. Overcome Resentment
One issue that holds men after divorce back is the issue of long standing bitterness and resentment. You may think you are now hardened and realistic, but holding a grudge against your ex, women, lawyers, or even yourself is not helpful to anyone. In fact, being angry and resentful does nothing but hurt yourself, it certainly never hinders the target of your anger so why bother? Release this resentment and you will have a better, more positive outlook on life.
3. Do Not Use Children as Pawns
This SHOULD be obvious, but it is amazing how quickly you can forget this or not realize that you are using your kids as pawns in a horrible game of emotional chess with your ex wife. Children need you and your ex to be good parents despite your divorce and if you do not take the high ground and stop using them as pieces on this board, then you are to blame for their misery and your own NOT your ex wife – no matter what.
4. Get Active
Lack of activity has been proven to worsen depression. If you do even moderately light exercise regularly, even if you feel like dying from the pressures of post-divorce life, you will be able to cope better. Exercising releases feel good chemicals into the brain and will give you more energy in general. It will also help you maintain a better self image than if you mope about and become less fit and look less appealing. Force yourself to do some light exercise at least during this period it will help a lot.
Another divorce advice: Divorce Recovery For Men
5. Get Social
Do not sit alone with your thoughts. They will run over and over again in your mind like a broken record. Being social will help do a few things. IT will take your mind off your divorce problems for a time, it will bring you some perspective in life, it may give you an outlet for your emotions that are being denied or cooped up, and it also will make you happier. Human contact and the relationships we for in life of all sorts have been shown to increase human happiness. So don’t sit alone all day, force yourself to interact more and the benefits will be there.
6. Learn to Forgive
Forgiveness might seem like something you cannot do. Many guys say they will never forgive their ex wife, and some cannot forgive themselves for actions they did as well. The problem is, this grudge holding will only hold you back. You can never move on from a divorce while you have not given true forgiveness to a person. This will take the ball and chain of your divorce off your soul and let you fly free again without that burden hanging off you interfering with all parts of your life.